Death of mother and disabled daughter after refusing help

Another sad sad story hit the media headlines a couple of days back. This time it appears that the mother of a disabled daughter died suddenly leaving the daughter (apparently paralysed from the neck down) to stave to death next to her.

What sets this apart from other incidents that tend to hit  the headlines is that in this instance it appears that the mother was offered help and access to services on several occasions, but that she had refused all offers.

According a neighbour, quoted in The Independent, ”Stephania gave her life to caring for her daughter. She almost wore it as a burden that her daughter was disabled. She felt she was responsible.” I can understand the sentiment behind this statement. I suspect many of us feel a burden of responsibility for those we care for. Its why the state is often able to get away with shoddy treatment of carers. Because we’re not going to walk away are we.

But that’s the point really. Because we are not going to walk away, and will take on the lions share of the burden of caring, then we should not feel guilty about accepting what help is offered to us.

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